you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
I hate it when you make eye contact with someone bcs you are about to make fun of them and they take it as a hint to come hit on you.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
