How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
Woke to a half burnt 20 in my pocket, covered in mud, clothes all wet, so im assuming I didn't use that 20 you gave me for a taxi
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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