If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
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