On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
