It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
What's the point in getting all dressed up and going when i'm just gonna throw up on myself by midnight?
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
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