What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
