Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
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