You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
3 2 1 whiskey
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
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