please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
I AM VODKA MAN
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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