I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Randomize
