Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
