i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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