Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize