Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
After we had sex he told me it was a "goodbye gift". We haven't talked since.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Randomize
