My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
I'm like, not good at living.
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize
