How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
Randomize
