Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Is it inappropriate to send a happy 3-year anniversary of having a threesome with you and your ex girlfriend on easter text?
Lusting after Beyonce when you're a lesbian is like having a crush on Jesus. You just don't do it.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
