I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Straight up if I get stuck with her I'm going to drink myself into a prison cell.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
