Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
Randomize
