how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
I hate waking up Sunday morning and thinks "how many friends did I lose last night".... Normally it's between 1-5.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
