yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
I wanted him to come me this time. So I told him last time I was in the city I hit a lady on the head with an inflatable Santa Claus and just found out that the restraining order she requested against me was granted. We never hung out.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
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