Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
Why do I only have half my beard? My chin is so naked...
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
Randomize