We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
We're too hungover to prance.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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