i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
Welcome to my life. currently drinking beer through two straws. easier/faster that way.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Dick pics just aren’t doing it for me, this bowl of Mac n cheese and Game of Thrones trump you tenfold
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
