I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Randomize
