Miracle whip is the devil's jizz.
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
Randomize
