totally got the gold medal for the best fence jump when the cops came.
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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