the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Randomize
