Most awkward thing ever: Meeting your BattleShits opponent post war.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
Randomize
