I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
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