there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
Randomize
