You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
you will always have a special place in my vag
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Randomize