Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
This is my last chance to be the first person to fall off this roof.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Randomize
