I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
