R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Randomize
