I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
His exact words were "Can I meet your vagina?" I kept wondering if he was going to try to shake hands with it...
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
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