Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
I don't think he cares about your inhospitable uterus.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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