i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
Randomize
