How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
Somehow my drug dealer is stuck in my air-vent and now everything smells like patchouli, weed, deoderant and sweat.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
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