I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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