we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
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