I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
He fucked me so well and hard that the couch slid into the Christmas tree. I had to pull branches out of my hair.
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
If I stopped mid-sex because the guy was hung like a light switch, it doesn't count, does it? Like the five second rule.
Randomize
