Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
I think the puke all over the side of my car actually improves its appearance.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
Randomize
