do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
Just used the D.E.N.N.I.S system successfully.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Randomize