I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
when you get a chance can you look up 'free abortion clinic' for me? cuz i dont think i'll be lucky enough for a second miscarriage.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
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