ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Fat lady wearing Shape Up's. I would feel bad making crude comments, but she has to know it's coming.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
Randomize
