I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Randomize
