oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
