she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
He's on the porch naked. Help.
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
