I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
Randomize
