If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
i can't believe i had my finger in that
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
