why didn't you poke me back
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
A dry HJ only, please. I don't deserve the comforts of lube after my horrendous fantasy football performance
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Randomize
